Friday 25 April 2008

DJ Shadow & Cut Chemist

I've been going out to see bands and DJs for 20 years now, and, without sounding like a total fuckhead, I like to think I've pretty much heard and seen everything.

I've been to that many shows, seen so many awesome acts, and quite a few awful ones too, but honestly, I'm sick of the same old shit, week in, week out. I really feel old sometimes when I go out, especially in Melbourne because I don't know anybody, so I really am there just for the music.

And I've got to say,
DJ Shadow and Cut Chemist certainly wasn't what I was expecting, and if I was brutally honest I would have preferred to see brainfreeze, but that was pretty fucking good in my opinion.

I like to see and hear original stuff and that was some of the most entertaining and original music and mixing I've ever seen and heard.

The novelty of the music added to the novelty of mixing on 8 decks with all 45s was really special. I loved that they dropped Space Invaders by Player 1 and the Pacman theme. I loved the old 50s swing and rock and roll. I even loved the song they claimed was the worst song ever recorded. I had a smile on my face the entire time.

Yes, it was incredibly indulgent, but I loved the fact that they are masters of their craft and were willing to share their expansive and extensive collection with us.

Saturday 12 April 2008

Shocked and Ashamed

I normally don't write about personal things on this blog, but this has me so perplexed.

The other night I was really drunk, and someone gave me a shot of Chartreuse and I don't remember much after that, but I since discovered I sent my ex some very troubling sms's. I only vaguely remember sending them, but the content of them has me really ashamed at myself.

I abused her for my insecurities.

The thing is, I don't blame her for anything, and I don't feel that I have many insecurities, and I can't understand why I would send that.

It's certainly very out of character for the way I feel about life right at the moment.

I feel on top of the world. I love Melbourne, I'm making some great friends, I still have great friends back home, my job is wonderful and everyone there is glad I'm on the team and telling me I'm doing a really great job. The project is going fine and I can see multiple paths of direction I want to take my life.

My feelings for her have never been better since we broke up. She's getting engaged to a really cool guy, loving her life in the UK, doing well in her job, and I'm really happy she's happy.

I've never felt better about myself and my life. I've finally taken control of my life and my actions and feel the consequences of those actions are my own.

So why the hell did I abuse her in such a way, and so suddenly out of the blue?

I feel so ashamed. I really can't understand it.

I'm thinking maybe I wrote it as a joke or something, but that still doesn't make sense - how could she know it was a joke? Yes, the message was cut off - like I sent it accidentally, but that still doesn't excuse it.

It was stupid and idiotic, and I am at a loss to explain it.

It was so... schizophrenic of me.

I sent a message apologising, but I don't expect her to forgive me.

On the plus side, it's made me seriously consider giving up drinking for a while.

Wednesday 9 April 2008


Apparently hospitals are "over flowing" with people with preventable disease.

Alcohol, tobacco, drug and obesity cost Australia $56 billion and will cost some millions of lives by 2009.

"Health problems are not just about fixing hospitals, we actually have to fix some of the things that mean people end up in hospital."

"With prevention, clogged Hospitals will be freed up" were some of the quotes from the Health Minister.


Who the fuck is this government to tell me how to live?

And what exactly are hospitals for, if not to care for the sick - NO MATTER HOW THEY GOT SICK?

This is simply the Government trying to unload it's burden onto us, the hard working men and women of Australia who deserve a drink, a smoke or a joint.

All they want us to be is happy little worker bees, producing wealth for them and their corporation owning buddies.

"oh, don't be a drain on society, you've got to look after yourself".

Maybe if those pricks worked harder at making this society a better place for us ALL to live, maybe if they instead of opening up markets for banks to rape us, they made banks accountable to communities; instead of pouring billions into shoring up wasteful and unproductive industries like the Motor industry, they concentrated on infrastructure and maintaining control of public assets, we wouldn't feel the need to go home and drink, smoke or get high!

I'm sick of this bullshit nanny state mentality by all governments, left and right wing. I'm sick of these people thinking I need to be controlled, otherwise I'll go off the rails and do something "horrible".

We live in a society that has unprecedented life expectancy. People who are born with disabilities that would have killed them 100 years ago are living to 80 or 90 years old.

Why should it matter if someone wants to drink/smoke/drug themselves to death?

It's just nature's way to even out the population.

No one ever said we should prevent blind children from being able to live their lives the way they want, so why should I be any different because I've chosen to drink?