DJs I've seen

This list is far from complete.

I've been to hundreds of shows, wandering from room to room, and my memory is not the greatest at the best of times.

So if anyone out there can help me out, remembers seeing something with me that I've missed, let me know! It will be greatly appreciated!

Adam Freeland
Ali B
Amon Tobin
Andy C
Aphex Twin
Aquasky
A-Sides
A-Skills
Atomic Hooligan
A-Trak
Autobots
Baboo
Bad Company
Bailey
Baobinga & ID
Benga
Blim
Bob Sinclair
Breakfastaz
Calibre
Calyx
Carl Cox
Cash Money
Chemical Brothers
Coldcut
Craze
Cut Chemist
Cut Le Rock
Cyantific
D Bridge
Dave Clarke
Deadmau5
Deekline & Wizard
Digital Primate
Digweed
Diplo
Doc Scott
Dom & Roland
Drummatic Twins
Dub Pistols
Dynamo Productions
Elite Force
Ellis Dee
Evil Nine
Fat Boy Slim
Felix Da Housecat
Nick Warren
X-Press 2
Food & DK
Freestylers
Freq Nasty
Fresh
Friction
Friendly
Grand Master Flash
Groove Rider
High Contrast
Hurricane
Hype
Ian Pooly
Icey
Infusion
J Majik
James Zabiela
Jazzy Jeff
John B
Joker
Josh Wink
J-Rocc
Katalyst
Kid Koala
Klute
Koma & Bones
Krafty Kuts
Krush
Krust & Die
Laidback
Layo & Bushwacka
Lee
Lee Coombs
London Electricity
LTJ Bukem
Luke Vibert
Mark Rae
Marky
Masters At Work
Matrix
Midfield General
Mix Master Mike
Mr Scruff
NAPT
Neotropic
Noize
Paul
Paul Oakenfield
Pendulum
Plump DJs
Presha
Q Bert
Rae & Christian
Randall
Richie Hawtin
Rico Tubbs
RJD2
Rob Swift
Roc Raida
Roger Sanchez
Sasha
Scott Brown
Scratch Perverts
Shadow
Skool of Thought
Skreem
Soul of Man
Splitloop
Spooky
Stanton Warriors
Starky
State of Mind
Steinski
Sven Vath
Tayo
The Herbaliser
The Nextmen
The Rogue Element
Tiesto
Tiga
Tom Middleton
Top Buzz
Total Science
Umek
Vadim
Wiseguys
Yoda
Z Trip


Oh, and I've left off Australian DJs because, although I think most of them are fantastic and easily some of the best in the world, there are just too many of them and I don't want to offend someone by leaving them off :)

Bands I've seen (complete list)

Here's the almost complete list... I'm sure I'm missing some ;)

I've also included DJ "live shows" like Shadow & Cut Chemist, Kid Koala, Daft Punk and so on... shows good enough to transcend the simple mixing of records to be a full show.

The ones in bold are the one's I saw in the last year or so.

1200 Techniques
AC/DC
Acyalone
Afro Celt Sound System
Afrobeat Public Opinion Orchestra
Alien Ant Farm
Amp Fiddler
Aphex Twin
Ash
Atari Teenage Riot
Basement Jaxx
Beastie Boys
Beasts of Bourbon
Beth Orton
Billy Bragg
Bjork
Black Eyed Peas
Blackalicious
Blink-182
Bliss
Bloc Party
Blue King Brown
Body Count
Breakestra
Butterfingers
Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine
Cat Power
Coldcut
Cooking on 3 Burners
Corduroy
Cosmic Psychos
Cypress Hill
Daft Punk
Def FX
Depeche Mode
Devo
Dilated Peoples
Dizzee Rascal
DJ Shadow
DJ Shadow & Cut Chemist
Downsyde
Easy Star All Stars
Elbow
Faith No More
Fat Freddy's Drop
Fear Factory
Femi Kuti
Foo Fighters
Franz Ferdinand
Freestylers
Fund-a-mental
Funkoars
Garbage
Gerling
Gnarls Barkley
Good Buddha
Gorilla's Sound System
Gotan Project
Gotye
Grinspoon
Handsome Boy Modeling School
Happy Mondays
Headless Chickens
Helmet
Hexstatic
Hilltop Hoods
Hilltop Hoods & Adelaide Symphony Orchestra
Hole
Hoodoo Gurus
Human League
Hunters and Collectors
Ice T
Iggy Pop
Infusion
Inspiral Carpets
Itch-E & Scratch-E
James Brown
Jamie T & the Pacemakers
Jamiroquai
Jarvis Cocker
Jebediah
Jet
John Butler Trio
Jungle Brothers
Jurassic 5
Kid Koala
Kaiser Chiefs
Katalyst
Kosheen
KoЯn
L7
Leningrad Cowboys
Live
Lou Reed
Luke Slater’s Freek Funk
Lyrics Born
Machine Gun Fellatio
Madness
Magic Dirt
Mark Ronson's Version
Massive Attack
Metallica
Midnight Juggernauts
Midnight Oil
Ministry
Mudhoney
Muph & Plutonic
Muse
My Chemical Romance
Mylo
Neon Indian
New Order
Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds
Nightmares On Wax
Nine Inch Nails
Paul McCartney
Pavement
Peaches
Pendulum Live
Pennywise
Pet Shop Boys
Peter Gabriel
Pharcyde
Phoenix
Pivot
Pixies
Placebo
Pop Will Eat Itself
Porno for Pyros
Powderfinger
Primal Scream
Primus
Prodigy
Public Enemy
Q-Tip
Queens of the Stone Age
Rage Against The Machine
Rammstein
Rancid
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Regurgitator
Resin Dogs
Roni Size’s Raprezent
Roots Manuva
Roy Ayres
Salmonella Dub
Sarah Jones & the Dap Kings
Scissor Sisters
Shihad
Silverchair
Skunkhour
Slipknot
Snoop Dog
Snow Patrol
Sonic Animation
Sonic Youth
Soulwax
Soundgarden
Spank Rock
Spiderbait
St. Germain
Stereo MCs
Stevie Wonder
Stone Roses
Supergroove
Superjesus
The Avalanches
The Bamboos
The Breeders
The Cat Empire
The Chemical Brothers
The Clouds
The Cruel Sea
The Crystal Method
The Cult
The Cure
The Dandy Warhols
The Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy
The Donnas
The Flaming Lips
The Hard Ons
The Herd
The Killers
The Living End
The Offspring
The Presets
The Rapture
The Red Eyes
The Roots
The Smashing Pumpkins
The Specials
The Stranglers
The Streets
The Strokes
The Swiss
The Tea Party
The White Stripes
TISM
Tool
Tricky
U2
Ugly Duckling
UNKLE
Urge Overkill
Violent Femmes
Ween
Wolfmother
Wutang
You Am I

I am a winner!

Despite a few people grumbling about it (Rapture IS a utopia, dumbasses!) I won a copy of the Bioshock 2 prize pack from Kotaku!

Here's my entry:

(sung to the tune of Blondie’s “Rapture")

Toe to toe
fighting very close
Plasmids firing
until you’re comatose
Wall to wall
Daddy’s hypnotised
And they’re stepping heavily
Stuck each night in Rapture

Gathering Adam
little sisters
Spindly movements
And a mass attack

Face to face
simply terrified
And it’s finger chopping
Twenty-four hour dying in Rapture

Tenenbaum told me everybody’s high
Atlas spinnin’ not savin’ my mind
Adam is fast, Adam is cool
Fontain say don’t be a fool
And you don’t stop, Suchong
Ryan is makin’ you do wrong

And you get in your sphere and you trip real far
And you dive all night and you’ll see no light
And it fills with water and sinks to the ground
And out comes a man from above
And you try to run but he’s got a gun
And he shoots your head and freezes you dead
And then you’re in the main foyer
Dancing with an ex-lawyer
You kill many slicers
to make the place nicer
And you don’t stop, you keep on killing stars
And you just get more scars
You go out at night and into the deserted streets
Race to face, fight cheek to cheek
One to many and man on man
Fighting toe to toe
Don’t move too slow, ’cause the Big Dad
Is through with slicers and he’s very mad
wall to wall, Through door and door, up hall to hall
He’s gonna get ‘em all
Rapture, be pure
Take a tour, through the sewer
You’ll strain your brain, go insane
You’ll be singin’ la la in the rain
I said don’t stop, drop a block

Well now you see what you wanna be
Make your choice on the VT
‘Cause the man upstairs he won’t care
And now he’s gone back down to hell
None of this bodes too well
And you flip flop, but you don’t stop
Just blast em with a sure shot
‘Cause the man over there is killing and screaming
And now he smokes cigars, level up!

AC [lightning bolt] DC

So I've finally seen AC/DC.

It comes as a shock to many people that I'm an AC/DC fan.

But AC/DC remind me of my youth. I remember sitting up all night listening to AC/DC with Philly D as we played computer games.

So why deny my bogan heritage any longer? Sure, during the 90s I essentially shunned AC/DC, and I fucking hated growing up in Elizabeth, but then I just lost the hate. The people I grew up, many of whom I'm still proud to call friends, shaped me into the person I am today, and the music we listened to was a massive part of that.

And Back in Black is one of the world's greatest albums, especially considering the time it was made, and It's A Long Way To The Top is one on the world's greatest songs.

So, when they announced the tour, I wasn't going to miss out. I camped by the internet and hit refresh until I snagged a ticket to the Melbourne Saturday night concert. Sure, it's not as exciting and romantic as camping out for days under blankets sharing the camaraderie that line waiting brings, but it's a fuckload easier.

After losing my job last November, I was a little worried I wouldn't be able to make it. Job offers from interstate and overseas never eventuated, so the worry was misplaced.

Getting to Etihad Stadium was easy - the train stops just outside, although I had to find a internet cafe to print my ticket out. Thank the universe for the internet!

I got in just as Calling All Cars finished. I downed a few scotches and then found a nice spot mid centre of the stadium. It was pretty packed even at 7:30pm, and although I could have pushed my way further to the front, I knew there would be cameras and screens, so I just didn't feel the need to.

Wolfmother opened for them, and were really good. They kicked off with Dimension, then played a couple of new songs, then got the crowd singing with Woman. During the slow bit of White Unicorn, you know, the bit that sounds like Riders on the Storm, they actually started playing Riders of the Storm. Stockdale's voice is perfect for a Doors cover, and I'm surprised they don't do more of them. They closed with Joker & Thief.

I thought they were a brilliant selection for AC/DC's opening band. They're liked well enough by a wide range of people that people would be singing along, rocky enough to fit in with the overall vibe of the gig, yet not good enough to overpower AC/DC (if that was indeed possible).

After a short wait, the screens lit up and showed a short video of the band on a train. Full of childish innuendo and sexually suggestive images, the "train" then smashed onto the stage as the band played Rock and Roll train. Right from this very first moment I knew we were in for a rocking show!

They played another off their new album, something I'm not overly familiar with, and then got into the older tunes. Dirty Deeds, Shot down in Flames, and Thunderstruck. All the while the whole audience is singing and screaming and having a great old time.

But things really got wild when Brian started singing She's Got The Jack. The screen started showing all the girls on the guys shoulders, and up came the shirts. Brian even said "get your eyes off those titties" at one point, and then Angus started his strip. Much like Devo, these old rockers still know how to entertain.

The classics came thick and fast. The bell lowered for Hells Bells, with Brian swinging from the bottom of it. Shoot to thrill and War machine - a track I do know off Black Ice - had cool visuals with the live action on stage, but nothing was as cool as High Voltage, done as a tribute to Bon Scott with his grinning face looking down at the thousands singing along with his lyrics.

More classics - You Shook Me All Night Long, TNT and Whole Lotta Rosie, which featured a massive fat lady riding the train. Let there be Rock was where Angus got loose, and showed that even at 60 he can still play that guitar well. The encore of Highway to Hell and For those about to Rock was absolutely brilliant.

I would have liked to hear more of my favourite songs - If You Want Blood and Who Made Who would have been nice, but overall I couldn't have been happier with the set. This was what a rock concert should be like! Entertaining and fun, no matter what was played.

I felt the same after AC/DC as I did after Madness, Devo, Primal Scream and The Specials last year. Sometimes I admit I caught up in too much negativity and cynicism, and it takes old farts like these to remind me life is all about having fun. If they can do it at 60, then I should be doing it now, and keep doing it until I'm 60, too.

Journalism

I wrote this as a response to a Crikey commentator. It's essentially what I wrote in Uni about journalism in one of my essays, and it's something I've been meaning to post for a while...

The only role ACA / TT play in society is to sell advertising to those too lazy to switch the channel after the news.

If you think it’s anything else, then you’re an idiot. Simple as that.

However, before you have a go at me for being “puffed up with moral superiority” I also think this of MOST journalism. Including Crikey.

Journalism has never been about the “Truth”. It’s never been about “Facts”. It’s never been about “Democracy”. It’s never been about “Reality”.

Journalism’s first and continued motivation is profit for the owners.

The very first broadsheets were advertising forums for shipping services, designed to profit those who advertised. These morphed into the first newspapers and they too were all about profit.

The very first photo published in a magazine was a montage - two images spliced together. Never mind the fact that this was the first photo published in a magazine - that wasn’t sensational enough - so they had to fake the truth of that photo.

And this sensationalism and profiteering has always existed in the media. The fact that some of it does some good in the world doesn’t excuse or counter this very basic fact about media.

If I make a good product, you’ll buy it. Likewise with media - it’s simply a product. If someone makes good media - and the definition of “good” changes with the individual - people will consume it.

When ACA expose a charlatan, don’t think for a minute they’re doing it for “the good of the people” - they want people to view the adverts and to make a profit out of that.

Likewise, Crikey’s exposure of the tactics ACA use is fantastic, but don’t think for a minute this was published for any other reason than making people want to subscribe to Crikey.

I want to expand on it later too. I think some may view this as extremely cynical, but I don't, and will explain why in a later post.

Avatar

I finally saw Avatar today...

I thought it was a terribly poor and completely transparent, over preachy morality play, with a sappy, predictable and tedious story, barely saved by the admittedly impressive special effects and creature/vehicle design.

Next time you make the world's most expensive movie James, I think you need to spend more money on the actual story...

Top Games for 2009

My top games I've played for 2009 would be:

Fifa 10 (xbox 360)
Such an amazing representation of the World Game.

Batman: Arkham Asylum (PS3)
Great game. Lots of fun and some great characterisation.

Dragon Age: Origins (PC)
So deep and involved. I'm still playing through it for the second time!

Mad World (Wii)
Violent and funny, with a cool and different art aesthetic.

Special mentions to:
Assassin's Creed 2 and Modern Warfare 2.

The worst would have to be:

Indiana Jones and the Staff Of Kings (Wii)
Such terrible execution of the Wiimote. So many times I was doing ridiculous gestures where a button press would suffice.

Sydney Trip 2010

Got back from Sydney this week.

On Thursday we did the toursity thing. We took Luke to Circular Quay, the Opera House, the Rocks and Darling Harbour. Found a great pub in the Rocks called the Lord Nelson Brewery Hotel which had some fine micro brews on tap.

On Friday we headed over to Manly, spent the day at the beach swimming and perving. Friday night the guys went out drinking and I went to my friend Lisa and Simon's for dinner. I tried to meet up with them after, but the bouncer at Goldfish wouldn't let me in, claiming I was too drunk. All I had was two beers! The guy was just a fuckhead.

Saturday we went to Bondi. I've been there before, but never swam there. The water was really clear, which surprised me. After swimming we went to the Bavarian Bier Cafe and had Mango Beer and pretzels.

On Sunday was the Days Like This festival.

We got to the Moore Park Entertainment Complex around 12:30, had another Mango Beer, and went in. The venue was small, and there wasn't much seating really, but those were my only complaints.

The Bamboos rocked it at 1:30pm, and must have been hot in those suits! Amp Fiddler was amazing - nice soulful music. We caught the last song of The Swiss which was good, but that stage was running late so we missed Cassette Kids.

Dilated Peoples were great too, but we left early to see Cat Power, who whilst enjoyable was a little too mellow and bluesy for this kind of festival. We missed Ugly Duckling as we couldn't get in to that area again.

Caught Neon Indian instead, who were pretty cool. Roots Manuva was awesome as ever, with Ricky Rankin and a new guy adding greatly to the sound.

We made our way into the "dance" area and caught the end of Joker... all I'll say about that is dubstep sucks even more when you put rnb vocals in it. Bukem and Conrad rocked up late and the sound was horrendous, so I left and saw Nextmen.

Interestingly, Nextmen had a bigger crowd than Bukem, and I loved it, that is until they started playing dubstep *sigh* They even played a riverside dubstep remix *double sigh*

Returned to Bukem via Pivot (I think) where the drummer was thumping like a mad cunt! Conrad's microphone was still too loud, but the sound was much better overall. I guess the sound guy had stopped chatting up the girl he was talking to and actually did his job...

Then Marky and Stamina jumped up and sounded great, with the crowd going nuts to Marky's scratching. Left to see Redman and Method man for about 15 minutes, but the dnb was better, so returned just to see Marky start playing some old house and cheesy hiphop, which was awesome too.

It was a rather small party, but the vibe reminded me of the first BDO in Adelaide - just lots of happy people there who were music lovers, not party goers.

No short shorts on men, no steroid juice heads (although there were a few drunk topless guys... but it was Sydney after all), no women dressed like they should be on a catwalk... just an awesome crowd listening to awesome music.

Would definitely go again next year, depending on the line up.

On Monday we hired a car and headed to the Blue Mountains. A day of dancing followed by a day of hiking nearly killed me. I think my new years resolution is to get a little fitter.

Damo's got most of the photos on his camera, although I took my camera to the Blue Mountains, and will put them online soon.

We had a great time over there, although I am a little sad "the band" has broken up as Damo has headed off to South America for 4 months.

Still my favourite record

Sex Party!

I think I'm going to vote for these people in the Higgins bi-election...

Australian Sex Party


Mainly because of the following policies:

• Introduce an R and X rating for computer games
  
  
• To overturn mandatory ISP filtering of the Internet and return Internet censorship to parents and individuals.
  

• To enact national pregnancy termination laws along the same lines as divorce law — which allow for legal, no-fault and guilt-free processes for women seeking termination.

• The listing of Viagra, Cialis and other drugs used to treat sexual dysfunction, on the Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme.**

• Overturn restrictions on aid to overseas family planning organisations that reference abortion.
  
  
• Ending the tax exempt status for religions.
  

** not that I have need of these types of things... currently... ;)

iPhone blog

I've got a new iPhone! Testing out some new apps and such ;)


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Piracy and Advertising

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, as I'm downloading a lot of TV shows because Australian TV sucks. When they DO show new content that isn't "reality" shit, they'll fuck up the programming with too many adverts and worse, delay or cut the show due to sports or reality shows!

Now, I would quite happily watch HULU with all it's advertising and such, but it's blocked here. And I'd buy from iTunes if the shows were able to be viewed on my PS3. I'd pay for them on my PS3 or Xbox, but again, the service is blocked.

But one of the biggest arguments against downloading TV shows is the loss of advertising revenue networks face.

But hang on a second.

An average person in the US will see between 600-625 adverts (potential exposures as they call them) per day from all media sources including radio, billboards and the like, with about 400 coming from TV over the 4 hour TV watching average [src] . I'm fairly certain it's similar in Australia.

That means I've seen over 4 million adverts in my life time (assuming I watched an average of 4 hours of TV since I was allowed to watch TV at age 5).

Haven't I paid enough for this content already?

Isn't it enough when people ask me what I'd like to drink at a restaurant I say "coke" without thinking*? Or I know there's a glass and a half of full cream dairy milk in cadburys? Or that Beans Means Heinz?


*this is assuming it's a "dry" restaurant... otherwise it's "beer".

It's all lies!

How many lies do you believe are true?

Got a question for you - how did Apple start?
Steve & Woz in their garage, building their first computer together is what most of you will say... LIES!

Both of them worked at HP and Atari. Both of them were involved in the formative years of those companies - Woz tried to sell his idea to HP and they didn't go for it, so Steve and Woz went out on their own. Sure, they had a garage, they also had formal training and careers in the industry long before breaking out on their own.

How about Youtube?
Two dudes who wanted to share their videos with one another in a discussion after a dinner party... LIES!

Steve Chen and Chad Hurley both cut their teeth at PayPal. In fact, Hurley was one of PayPal's first employees and helped designed its logo. He is also the son-in-law of James Clark, who founded Netscape and Silicon Graphics. A long way from college kids who did it "for kicks".

How many other stories are like this - creation myths, expounded and exaggerated and falsified to sell a story rather than to tell the truth?

I'd argue all of them.

Chris Columbus' is a long cry from looking for India from the West in order to prove the world wasn't flat amongst a mutinous crew. In actuality, he went off looking for gold to get rich so he could get favour of the Queen, and sailors of his day knew the world was round from sailing around the ocean and navigating by the stars and an astrolabe for centuries.

Of course, the greatest creation myth of all is the one found in the Bible, but that's probably unfairly called out because it was the first reproduced in book form and accessible to the 'common man', the first to be set to a specific formula and stay that way, rather than alter and change like so many spoken myths before it.

But for centuries, people have been faking this myth, making it believable by things like the Shroud of Turin or Solomon's Pomegranate.

This is why the only truth is in archeology, the only science to believe is history.

Passenger Mix Tape – DJ Woody vs Body Snatchers

I had a whole different picture of who the Body Snatchers were before getting this release. For some reason I thought they were some lame arse corporate created boy band. So seeing them on a Passenger mix with the likes of Aquasky and Baobinga & ID, mixed by one of the UK's best scratch DJs, DJ Woody, had me really intrigued. Imagine my surprise and delight when instead of a bunch of boys of questionable sexuality harmonising about love, I get a gruff UK hiphop rapping about being tough and how great women with big asses are.

Much of this album is Woody dropping Body Snatchers acapellas over Body Snatchers beats, with some freestyle raps dropped here and there, and scratching thrown in for good measure. According to the tracklisting at any rate, many of the Body Snatchers tunes have been re-worked with different vocals and I suspect given phatter baselines. Most of the mixes are great and work really well together but then again, when you mash up an acapella and instrumental from the same group, it's never quite as interesting as mashing up two completely separate styles. Regardless, the mix slams the bass hard, and the various MCs deliver sound rhymes most of the time.

There are a few rhymes here and there which might leave you scratching you head. "I used to date a girl and her name was Carla / now I've got a Brazilian and her name is Flavia" then something muttered about Shakira… doesn't sound that good on paper and is even worse in verse. However, the rapping over the awesome Monster Cash builds up with the music and is a piece of brilliance which will get your head nodding where ever you're listening to it.

One of my favourite elements of this mix is its sense of fun. A lot of people seem to be so serious in their mixes, yet this one has silly rhymes and shoutouts all the way through it. It has an old school sensibility, with many guests popping up, including BluRum13, Goldmouf, Sirplus, Ragga Twins, and the aforementioned Aquasky and Baobinga & ID. Admittedly you might not know half of these names, but a good mix CD should make you want more from the artists involved, and this album certainly has done that for me.

4 Stars

Test of word blogging

If you see this, expect more content soon J

 

How to get man back to the moon

On the 40th Anniversary of the Moon Landing, I've figured how to get us back up there!

All it requires is one little man with a gripe against America...

Open letter to Kim Jong-Il from the adventurous people of planet Earth.


Dear Kim,

We loved you in Team America. But we do not wish to talk about your wonderful acting. We're writing to you to ask you a favour. We understand you don't like the Yanks much, and frankly, neither do we. They're fat, loud and obnoxious, preaching to everyone about how great and free they are, and yet they can't even show a boob on television without the whole country going apeshit.

We know you have rockets and nukes, but we know, as well as you do, that you wouldn't be able to fire one off before you were bombed back into the stone age. Sure, you might be able to hurt South Korea or Japan, but look what happened to them last time someone fucked with them! You can't deny either country is better off since the war, much better off the France, the UK and USA. Hell, the Japs have huge fuckoff robots everywhere!

So, as adventurous people of planet Earth, people who love adventure and want to see our race spread out amongst the stars, we ask you to direct your attention and missiles away from the pissants here, and instead look to the stars. After all, there are billions of planets out there waiting to be subverted to the communist cause! Hell, find one with the right kind of life, and you could be greeted as a God much like Chris Columbus was when he arrived in the Americas!

But that’s a little ways off, obviously. The first step should be the moon. If you get to the moon I guarantee this will completely piss off the Americans and Japanese, more so than if you bombed them. You bomb them, you’re ash. You own the moon, maybe charge people a fee for looking at it, and bam! Not only is your country rich, you can start negotiating properly with the capitalistic pigdogs on this planet.

Of course, this may create a space race, like in the 1960s and you might find the going tough. After all, the Americans do have an advantage with the quote International unquote space station spying on you as well as being a base of operations, but I’m sure that with your intelligence and demeanour you will be able to win at what ever you try.

Yours truly,

The adventurous people of planet Earth

Yay! I'm not going mad!

I live really close to a railway line.

On the occasional Sunday morning, usually when I've been hung over and still in bed, I've heard what sounded like a steam train go past my house.

It's always puzzled me. In fact, I thought I was hearing things and going mad (too much booze kills brain cells don't you know!), thinking it was a Ghost Train, because I didn't hear the chugging - just the toot of it's whistle - nor smell the coal-fire like I used to as a kid in Adelaide...

No you cunts, I'm NOT old enough to remember the times when steam train was the only form of travel!!! I'm talking about when I'd see steam engines like the Steam Ranger going to Gawler/the Barossa on the odd occasion.

Anyway, the line near my house is electric and at all other times I've only seen passenger trains go on it - not freight nor anything else, and I thought a steam engine might be too big for it, or something.

This morning, I heard the whistle, so I rushed to the door, and saw what it was - a push-pull steam train. It has an engine at both the front and back, I'm assuming so it can get up the hill to Glen Waverley. So yay, I'm not going insane. Nor is it a ghost train.

It fit perfectly under the electric wires, so obviously the government who put the wires in were intelligent enough to make them high enough. Pity the current government can't get the rail infrastructure these days though... BAM!

I looked it up online, and found out Steam Rail Victoria runs trains up to Glen Waverley every so often.

If I knew beforehand, I would have prepared a day of it! As it stands, I've got two overdue reviews to write up and very little cash left from last night's shenanigans.

But I found the also do a Snow Train Ride at the end of July for about $100 return, so might take that for a lark... who's up for it?

Hawaii was awesome!

Hawaii was absolutely beautiful and a heap of fantastic fun!

A True Tropical Paradise

I had a ball swimming, kayaking, snorkelling, and hiking all over the place.

If you've got facebook, my photos are here although they might be open to view by any and everyone...

Some wonderfully friendly Russian-American girls we met

However, if they aren't and you want to see them, try here! I've added a new and improved gallery site to my website - Gallery.FunkyJ.com

The amazing black-sand beach

So far I've put all my pictures from 2006 and up until Womad 2007 up there, although I've still got to go through and fix up the dates and meta tags for quite a lot of them.

It's interesting looking through all these... people I used to hang out with but don't any more, people who used to be friends or partnered but aren't, people who used to live in the country but moved far away, and people who used to be alive but aren't any more...

Makes me a bit homesick actually... But then I look at the pictures from Hawaii and think "fuck Adelaide for a joke..."

Five more sleeps!

Five more sleeps and I'm off to Hawaii!

I've never travelled outside of Australia so this is a first for me - and another first that would simply not exist had I still be living in Adelaide...

So fucking excited!

Travelling with a couple of mates from work and spending 3 days on Oʻahu (in Honolulu) and then 4 days on Hawai'i (the Big Island) before flying back and spending the weekend in Sydney.

I'm going to be Twittering from my phone (provided it works and doesn't cost me stacks!) and I will be taking my camera as well as my extra memory card...

It's going to be awesome!

OFLC kicks the crap out of Michael Atkinson

LOL!

OFLC kicks the crap out of Michael Atkinson

My Brute

Here's a fun little flash game for you all!

My Brute!

Type your name into the box to create a Brute, and battle against my brute for internet supremacy!

V Festival review

At first I wasn't really interested in this years V Festival. Snow Patrol and Kaiser Chiefs are ok, but not enough to spend $150 to go see.

But then Madness and Human League were added to the line up, and I bought tickets immediately! I even talked Ritters into coming over to it from Adelaide! There was no way I could miss one of the most fondly remembered bands of my youth!

We rocked up to the showgrounds around 3:30 and moved into the Virgin Mobile (Green) Stage to see Temper Trap, and try and get a spot for special guest Vanilla Ice. Yes, he's always been kind of crap, but the nostalgic appeal of seeing him was too much.

But the crush was too much, as it seemed everyone had the same idea, so we moved outside to get a drink. I saw a bit of the band Elbow and they were alright, then headed back to Vanilla Ice. I found a great spot outside near a window with a view straight onto the stage, and when Vanilla Ice jumped on stage the crowd went mental. It's obvious that he was just as wrapped being on stage as we were to see him.

We wandered over to see M83, but I only saw one tune and it's faded from memory because ran over to see Madness...

Oh My Gosh!

Beginning with One Step Beyond, the crowd went mental and they are just as crazy and silly as I remember from the videoclips. They played pretty much all their hits; Our House, My Girl, House of Fun, and concluded with Must Be Love. They also did a cover of Max Romeo's I Chased The Devil (the tune Prodigy sampled for Outa Space). Their onstage antics were fantastic; the lead singer calling for security because he saw a hippy in the crowd; the guitarist trying to climb the scaffolding and being chased by the security, and smoking and drinking on stage.

After Must Be Love the crowd thinned out with most of the kids heading off to see Kaiser Chiefs, but as I went to grab a beer, the lead singer comes back on stage and those of us remaining were treated to an encore of (the song) Madness and Slow Boat To Cairo. Most of those remaining were the older people, and things got really silly here, with people skanking arm in arm and even a konga line snaking through the crowd!

All it all it was seriously one of the best performances I've witnessed.

Ritters and I became separated at this point, she went to see all of Kaiser Chiefs and I went to get more beer... I saw most of Kaiser Chiefs and liked them a lot, but have to admit the songs I knew well were all from videogames. I snuck off to see a bit of Snow Patrol, who were a little boring to be honest.

We reunited after Kaiser Chiefs and headed to see Human League. We got in just in time for Don't You Want Me. Their set was pretty cool and very 80s - I'm surprised how much of their lyrics I remember actually - and their encore was Electric Dreams, which was, needless to say, awesome.

Then we decided to see the Killers. Then decided that was a bad idea because they actually suck, and headed off home before the crowd.

V Festival is starting to become one of my favourite Australian festivals. It has a line up that appeals to a wide range of punters. I've seen 4 bands I thought I'd never see live - Madness, Pixies, Human League and Vanilla Ice, plus some cool acts like Temper Trap, Kaiser Chiefs, Gnarls Barkley, Jarvis Cocker and The Rapture. It's not nearly as packed as Big Day Out, and the crowd seems much nicer and less fucked up than other festivals.

Grow a pair, would you?

I'm so sick of politicians lacking a decent pair of nuts these days.

I really think the Defense Minister, Joel Fitzgibbon, should step down.

Personally I don't care if he's banging that chinese woman's entire family from her grandpa to her dog, he did they wrong thing (not notifying the Senate of his overseas trips) and was caught.

If he had a pair, he'd step down. After all, the government can tell him to go shove his resignation and get back to work.

That's far more noble and honest than to lie, then apologise simply because you got found out.

These career politicians have to go.

We need a system where people are voted in on their merits and skills, and not because of their Party standings.

Lily Allen – It’s Not Me It’s You

Well, hasn't our little Lily Allen grown up a bit over the past few years? Whilst her second album contains all of her venomous working class wit, and vociferous understanding of modern culture, yet it also reveals a softer, kinder Lily who's no longer completely immature and angry about absolutely everything.

The first song is Everyone's At It, where Allen rips into everyone for not paying attention to the drug culture we've created, and everyone from users to parents to politicians refusing to accept responsibility. The Fear is all about our obsession with celebrity, and mostly Allen's celebrity. Back to the Start is about mending relationships, as is He's Not There, where Allen forgives her absent father, saying such stuff as "I'm so pleased I never gave up on him, oh you wouldn't believe some of the things he did".

22 is about a girl who parties through the 20s and finds her future unpromising unless she gets a man and settles down. Who'd Have Known and Chinese are actual love songs, insomuch as she's singing about enjoying being with an individual. She's even singing about God with the song Him, wondering what he thinks of all this. All of these songs contain deep lyrics and motives suitable to a Bob Dylan type song, but are wrapped up in such amazing bubblegum pop, and I'm just not sure if it's sublime or ridiculous.

But then Allen drops her smarts with Not Fair, a whiney number about her man not being good in bed, and Never Gonna Happen about dumping a guy who just keeps hanging on. Yeah yeah, we get it; all men are pricks, whatever. And Fuck You is a happy little sing-along aimed at George Bush, who she calls evil, racist, homophobic and dumb. And whilst that may be true, she could have said it a little more intelligently.

It's Not Me It's You is a great second album, showing however unlikely, Lily Allen has staying power. If you've never liked her accent and overall vibe you're not going to really get into this either, but the music is poppy and fun, her voice still melodic yet brash, and it's just an enjoyable album.

3 Stars

More bands I've seen

I thought I better add to the list bands I've seen as my memory ain't what it used to be ;)

These are all from the last two or so years...

Bloc Party
Billy Bragg
Bjork
Cypress Hill
Devo
Dizzee Rascal
Funkoars
Good Buddha
Gorilla's Sound System
Headless Chickens
Jungle Brothers
Mark Ronson's Version
Midnight Juggernauts
Nine Inch Nails
Pendulum Live
Pharcyde
Public Enemy
Q-Tip
Rage Against The Machine
Regurgitator
Roy Ayres
Sarah Jones & the Dap Kings
Stevie Wonder
The Bamboos
The Presets
The Stranglers
UNKLE

Melbourne Earthquake

So, this earthquake occurs tonight...

but funnily enough it occurred at the exact same time as I started up a game, so I thought it was just my subwoofer being too loud and shaking the desk

The BPA – I Think We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat

Norman Cook drops the Fatboy Slim moniker and presents a varied album of not-quite dance but still catchy and often fun tracks, in the guise of The BPA (Brighton Port Authority) – I Think We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat. Some of the quality dips below that of the best of Palookaville, whereas others are shining examples of Norman Cook at his bes

Without a doubt the stand out track is Toe Jam with David Byrne and Dizzee Rascal. This calypso inspired load of nonsense is Cook channelling Talking Heads incredibly well, with Dizzee's brief cameo being brilliantly placed. Other tracks which really pleased my ear were the jangly guitars on He's Frank with Iggy Pop, and the very Bloc Party sounding Local Town with Jamie T on guest vocals.

One unexpected highlight is So It Goes, a 70s inspired soul jam with gospel organs and Olly Hite's quite impressive voice belting out. Another is Seattle, an incredibly catchy pop number featuring the modestly named Emmy The Great. It's one of those songs that just gets stuck in your head for days. Jumps The Fence is the oddest song next to Toe Jam, with Connan Mockasin's strong New Zealand accent lending a further amount of surrealism to the track.

The middling songs come from Pete York on Dirty Sheets and dance DJ turned singer Ashley Beedle on Should I Stay Or Should I Blow. They're not terrible songs, but just don't have the impact of the other songs. However, Superman and Superlover are both slower tracks, and to my mind some of the weakest songs. Then again, I've never been able to get into Cagedbaby.

One of the biggest disappointments of the album is it has in clear writing on the cover the word "Lateef", yet he's not to be found anywhere on the album. Lateef saved Palookaville from complete condemnation, and his absence despite the advertising is sorely missed.

2 Stars

Stupid Survey

Survey:

1. My ex... probably still hates me...

2. Maybe I should... stop spending money on gigs!

3. I love... music.

4. People would say that I'm... better than you.

5. I don't understand why people... don't think like I do.

6. When I wake up in the morning... spend too long in the shower.

7. I lost my... lust for life.

8. Life is full of... broken dreams and unfulfilled promises... luckily none of mine!

9. My past is... full of mistakes and missed opportunities.

10. I get annoyed... often.

11. Parties are... a staple of my life.

12. I wish... I did all this 10 years earlier.

13. Dogs... are good for attracting women.

14. Cats... are selfish cunts - just like me.

15. Tomorrow... can wait.

16. I have a low tolerance... for people who can't tolerate others.

17. If I had 10 million dollars... I would get a ticket into space.

18. I'm totally terrified... I won't ever get to experience space travel.

19. My spouse... will have to be awsome.

20. I'm listening to... everything.

21. Outside... is there for the taking.

22. My car... is waiting to be bought... and for me to get a license .

23. Fish n chips... are best by the beach.

24. Music... is often the only thing worth living for.

25. I completely trust... no one.

26. I am thinking... it's late and I shouldn't be posting this crap.

27. This weekend I am... enjoying my free time. And playing videogames.

28. True love... is like the cake... a lie.

29. Down at the disco... I get my groove on.

30. Before I go to bed I... think about my friends and how much I miss them.

one word answers

OK, Maz sent me this via facebook.

Facebook allows you to import blogs as notes.

As I'm pretty lazy and rarely update my own blog, let alone have another one on facebook via the notes system, I thought I'd do that fancy-schmansy import thing.

So here it goes:

You're only allowed to post one word answers to these:

1. Where is your cell phone? pocket
2. Your significant other? nonexistant
3. Your hair? neat
4. Your mother? elsewhere
5. Your father? nonexistant
6. Your favorite thing? music
7. Your dream last night? coincidental
8. Your favorite drink? beer
9. Your dream/goal? spaceflight
10. What room you are in? computer
11. Your hobby? games
12. Your fear? celibacy
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? there
14. Where were you last night? concert
16. Muffins? occassionally
17. Wish list item? sex
18. Where you grew up? Adelaide
19. Last thing you did? crapped
20.What are you wearing? clothes
21. Your TV? off
22. Your pets? dead
23. Friends? fine
24. Your life? busy
25. Your mood? tired
26. Missing some one? nope
27. Car? nope
28. Something you're not wearing? watch
29. Your favorite store? online
30. Your favorite color? blue
33. When is the last time you laughed? today
34. Last time you cried? forget
35. Who will resend this? GAF
36. One place that I go to over and over? work
37. One person who emails me regularly? spambots
38. My favorite place to eat? everywhere
39. Why you participated in this survey? bored
40. What are you doing tonight? nothing

Friends

Pippa's post about friends made me want to post this, because I've been thinking about friends a lot too lately.

I think I'm a bit lonely in Melbourne. I've noticed it's really hard to make friends here. I would call my flatmate and a few people at work "friends", and that's about it.

In Adelaide it seems I went to a few gigs, meet a few people, and then became almost life-long friends with them. In Melbourne I'm lucky to meet the same group of people twice when I'm out.

I met this girl at a wedding in Adelaide, and yes, I won't deny there was an attraction (at least one way) but we went out together the next day, and had a ball together. I met some of her work friends, and I could tell pretty much instantly that if I was back in Adelaide, these people would become my friends.

Nothing like this has happened in Melbourne except with workmates. Which is fine, I work with some great people, but it's just weird to me it's like this. It's something I didn't plan on encountering when I moved here. I expected to go out, see the same people, hang out, get friendly and become part of "the group".

Yet it hasn't happened.

It's like that episode of Seinfeld when he's talking about making friends with people when you're older.

"When you get in your 30s, it's very hard to make a new friend. Whatever the group is that you've got now, that's pretty much who you are going with. It's as if you're not interviewing, you're not looking at any new people, you're not interested in seeing any applications for new friends. The fact of the matter is they don't know the places, they don't know the food, they don't know the activities. If you're introduced to a friendly guy at a club or a gym, it's like you want to say to them: Hey look, I'm sure you're a very nice person, you seem to have a lot of potential, but I'm just not looking for friends now.

Of course when you are a kid, you can be friends with anybody. There are almost no qualifications required. If someone is standing out in front of your house now, that's good enough, You walk out say hello -and before you know it you're jumping up and down on the bed! As children you can have almost anything at all in common and its good enough for a friendship - You like coke? I like coke. Great let's be best friends!"

This, and the fact I can relate my life to an episode of Seinfeld kinda freaks me out...

Pure Bliss

I just found a great webpage all about one of my favourite Adelaide bands...



Written by the extraordinarily talented and incredibly friendly Dave McCain (aka DAMC / Techione), it details the rise and unfortunate fall of this incredible band.

On top of that, Dave's got their two eps available for download!

Website Updated

Well, as per usual I've been a little slack in keeping my website updated.

So this weekend I've gone and updated it all just for you!

I've added all my CD reviews from 2008, as well as updated the Interviews section with the work I've done for inthemix.com.au including my interview with Portishead's Geoff Barrow

Enjoy!

Top Shit of 2008

Yeah, I know it's a little late, but here are my top ten lists for 2008

Top 10 Video Games (all formats)
There are many games that maybe should be on this list, but I simply haven't played them so can't make judgement.

1. Fallout 3
2. Fifa 2009
3. Left 4 Dead
4. GTA IV
5. Saints Row 2
6. Grid
7. Fable 2
8. Civilization Revolution
9. NHL 09
10. Braid


Top 10 CDs
Again, these are CDs I've listened to / own / reviewed.

1. The Bamboos - Side Stepper
2. Baobinga & ID - Big Monster
3. CW Stoneking - Jungle Blues
4. The Heavy - Great Vengeance and Furious Fire
5. Sharon Jones & Dap Kings - 100 days, 100 nights
6. Downsyde - All City
7. Belleruche - The Express
8. Mr Scruff - Ninja Tuna
9. Primal Scream - Beautiful Future
10. DubXanne - Police in Dub

Another year been and gone!

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and all that.

My Christmas was pretty much a debacle, again.

I wanted to have Christmas with my mum and my aunt Laurine (her real sister) and my blood cousins.

On the hour long train ride to Gawler to meet my mum, who now lives in Saddleworth, my 4 year old reliable companion, my iPod, decides to die.

As an aside I also think it was stolen from my bag at the airport - but sucks to be them for getting a broken ipod!

Going on the old train line to Gawler Central brought back a load of memories - it's one I used to be intimately familiar with - but I was amazed at the amount of change that has occurred in the last 10 years too.

On the way to Ardrossan my mum tells me my cousins won't be coming... which annoys me no end as I could have caught up with my other family instead! So I had Xmas with my mum, my aunt, and my aunt's crazy friends - all about 60 years old and with whom I had nothing in common with. They were nice people, but still, I obviously would have preferred to be elsewhere.

I stayed at mums on Xmas Day eve, and the next day she went to drive me back to Gawler so I could catch the train back to Adelaide. She had little petrol, so we did the normal thing and went to the petrol station. However, the petrol station had no petrol either, and wasn't expecting the trucks to arrive until Mid morning. And the nearest petrol station was too far away to risk driving to, because there would have been a good chance it would have been closed for the boxing day holiday...

Worse still, I had to be back in the city by midday for what I consider my REAL Xmas celebrations - the ones with my friends from school, the ones we do every year with this year being even more special as one of whom was back from the USA and another over from WA...

Luckily the one bus which runs every two days from Far North SA to Adelaide just happened to be coming at the same time in the morning - If I had chosen to go any earlier or later I would have been stuck in Saddleworth.

I got on the bus, paid $20 and arrived 2 hours later in the city, then had another half hour trip to where I was staying...

Then, when I went to Stef's house for that Xmas, the Metroticket people who I had phoned earlier to enquire about buses told me the wrong number, and I had to walk for about 20 minutes from the wrong road to the right road!

Luckily, the rest of my trip to Adelaide was fucking awesome.

Renee & Paul's wedding was splendid, and I met a really nice girl there too! We went out again after that, and had heaps of fun with her and her crazy workmates. It was weird being in Adelaide and hanging out with a bunch of people I didn't know at all, but heaps of fun at the same time.

I also cuaght up with pretty much everyone I wanted to catch up with at Summer Break - lots of people I didn't expect to be there were there. It was awesome drinking, dancing and chatting with friends there.

That's my only issue with Melbourne - I don't have a regular crew here. There's a few guys from work I hang out with, but they're not as passionate as I am about music and gigs. So I always go out by myself - which I don't mind - but sometimes it would be nice to have friends here who had the same passion for music and gigs like I did in Adelaide.

Writing letters again

GOD DAMN IT!

I'm meant to be playing videogames, not writing to letters to clueless fucks about them.

After watching this YouTube video, I had to write a letter to YMA - people who, incidentally didn't hire me, because I confessed to liking videogames in my interview. Obviously it's an organisation that doesn't value truth and integrity...

Dear Sir or Madam

Recently on the ABCs Stateline program, your representative said "the interactive aspect of video games heightens the effect [of desensitisation of violence]"

Please show me ONE properly conducted, long term, scientifically proven, peer reveiwed report where the interactive nature of videogames has a greater effect of aggression in Children than any other media.

Apart from Craig Anderson's "research" (paid by the NIMF so about as "unbiased" and "scientific" as an report refuting climate change by a Mobil scientist - he's been discredited numerous times) every single search I have conducted reveals either a non-correlation, or even negative correlation. For example The BBFC discovered:

• gamers appear to forget they are playing games less readily than film goers forget they are watching a film because they have to participate in the game for it to proceed. They appear to non-games players to be engrossed in what they are doing, but, they are concentrating on making progress, and are unlikely to be emotionally involved;
• violence in games, in the sense of eliminating obstacles, is built into the structure of some games and is necessary to progress through the game. It contributes to the tension because gamers are not just shooting, they are vulnerable to being shot and most gamers are concentrating on their own survival rather than the damage they are inflicting on the characters in the game. While there is an appeal in being able to be violent without being vulnerable to the consequences which similar actions in real life would create, gamers are aware that they are playing a game and that it is not real life;

with the head of the BBFC saying "We were particularly interested to see that this research suggests that, far from having a potentially negative impact on the reaction of the player, the very fact that they have to interact with the game seems to keep them more firmly rooted in reality. People who do not play games raise concerns about their engrossing nature, assuming that players are also emotionally engrossed. This research suggests the opposite; a range of factors seems to make them less emotionally involving than film or television."

Dr. Cheryl Olson, author of the book Grand Theft Childhood says "The biggest fear of clinicians and the public alike—that violent video games turn ordinary children and adolescents into violent people in the real world—is not borne out by the data. Analyses of school shooting incidents from the US Secret Service⁵ and the Federal Bureau of Investigation National Center for the Analysis of Violent Crime⁶ do not support a link between violent games and real-world attacks".

So, I'd like to ask why your organisation keeps peddling this mis-truths about videogames to the media?

I'm not going to argue the media has no effect on people - it has even been found that scriptural violence sanctioned by God can increase aggression in people. But I wonder, does your organisation rail against people taking children to Church or exposing them to Christian music and film as much as they do against videogames??

I also wrote to Mick Atkinson for his stupid decision to not support a public consultion on videogames getting an R18+ rating, which he has since renegged on... flipflop out of office, Achyface!

Dear Mr Atkinson,

I would like to know why you have withdrawn your support for a discussion paper and public consultation process about the R18+ rating for videogames in Australia.

I understand your position on videogames and know quite a few people in the wider community share those views. I happen to think the evidence used to support your and similar views is circumstantial, and not backed up by proper scientific nor social research.

However, I know that no matter how well reasoned my arguments I will not change your view. But that is why we live in a democracy; we are allowed to have opposing views and are allowed to express them publicly, no matter how misinformed they may be.

However, the point of this letter is to understand why your support of the public consultation of this matter has suddenly been pulled, especially in light of the draft material you have received.

Can you please help me to understand why you think you are allowed to express and enforce your views on this matter, but feel that ordinary Australians should have no say whatsoever?

Labor's website reads: "we believe that a nation should be governed in the broader interests of all, not in the sectional interests of a few" and yet here you are, denying Australians a right to be involved in an important debate on censorship and ratings for reasons which are hitherto unfathomable.

It seems to go totally against the democratic processes of this country and moreover against the principles of the Labor party, and completely contradicts the notions of fairness and equality, the belief in "a fair go for all", the underpinnings of the Labor Party.

I look forward to your reply.

I'm also drafting a letter to Stephen Conroy, Minister for Communication, for his moronic decision to make isps filter internet traffic.

*sigh*

I recently heard the word "Kindargarchy", defined as:

a society increasingly dominated by the needs of children, or rather by the extraordinarily inflated needs we have come to attribute to them.

And it's so apt! I'm sick of these people screaming "won't someone think of the children!" when destroying our rights as human beings and the future of these children.

Because I AM thinking of the children.

I'm arguing for their right to be treated as adults and be able to speak, read, see and play what they like when they are older.

Yeah, well I'm a bad blogger, ok?

Yeah, I know I'm a bad blogger.

Because I don't blog about crap that doesn't matter, like feelings and shit, I don't really have much to say. And I could get worked up over a million things, but I can't be fucked any more. All the ranting and complaining about the world won't change it, so I don't bother to comment on it any more.

Even on forums and such where normally I'll be attacking this or defending that, I can't be bothered so much any more. It wastes time and drains my mind energy, or some shit.

If you really want to know what I've been saying about this or that, you can check up on me on the Gawker network, as I comment on their stories quite regularly... Also I'm still writing / reviewing for inthemix, xboxworld and now Time Out Sydney so read them too.

As to what's been happening - well, I got promoted for one - now I'm assistant producer. It's a lot different to QA Lead - I don't have to work late much. In fact, I don't play the game as much, either.

I had a DJ gig at Bimbo Deluxe the other week which went really well, and I'm hoping to get another soon.

I saw Stevie Wonder last week. It was absolutely amazing. Then I saw Roy Ayers, who was also very good.

And that's about it for this update...

Expect the next one in a few months :p

Been busy!

Yep, ok, so it's a long time between posts, but lets take stock of the situation...

My landlord's garden is dying because I haven't had time to water. My dishes from last weekend are in the sink. I haven't cooked my own dinner in a week, and any left over food is going off.

I've got 3 games to review, 6 CDs (mind you, 3 are singles) and I've only played one game and listened to the albums maybe twice each. Haven't even copied the singles to my ipod yet...

I paid for 3 months for Age of Conan and have played in once in the last month. I got Spore and have played it for maybe 2 hours.

I haven't been to a club in months, nor taken any pictures at any events.

AND

It's 7:30 on a Friday night and I'm still at work, waiting for a build... It takes about an hour to play through all the modes, once. And I'm working on one day of the weekend again.

Yes, I'm aware it's close to ZBR (zero bugs recorded) and that means it's crunchtime, but I've been working 12-14 hour days for the last 2 weeks now... still getting bugs!

And no doubt fuckhead reviewers and internet chat room cunts are going to diss our game because it introduces Avatars and tries to make the xbox more friendlier to a wider audience.

To all my friends in the Labor party...

To all my friends in the Labor party:

Lee Stevens, Mike Stevens, Nick Champion, Brigid Mahoney, Lee Odenwalder, Lisa Johnstone, Simon Lees, Brear Adams, Simon Flower, and others...

(Yes, I'm calling you all out!)

Please, please, please tell your fucked up leader Kevin Rudd to pull his stupid head out of his arse and stop acting like an opposition politician.

His antics over the green paper are the height of stupidity and foolishness.

He wants Australians to take Climate Change seriously, be willing to accept the pain it will bring, but when he releases what will be the most significant document of his career surrounding the most important issue of the decade, he goes and locks the Liberals and Greens out of the meeting, meaning they will have less time to respond.

How fucking childish, ignorant and selfish can someone be?

As you know, I don't have the greatest understanding of Australian Politics, but I thought that Krudd would have at least wanted to get the outcome of the paper through the Senate.

By locking the Greens and Liberals out of this very important decision making process, he's given them a reason to block the passage of the legislation through the Senate.

So, how is this being serious about Climate Change?

It's obvious Krudd has a half cocked plan that he knows won't get anywhere, so he's just decided to play politics to keep his newspoll results above 70%.

Can someone please inform him THE ELECTION IS OVER? And no one except politicians and journalists even care about those bullshit meters anyway!

He's acting exactly like John Howard, the person you all worked so damned hard to get out of power.

Krudd is not leading on these issues, he's being a politician playing the game, and it's simply not good enough.

I voted for Labor because I wanted change. I wanted a leader who would LEAD. Someone who would take the high road, and make hard decisions. Someone who would work with others to achieve the goals and objectives needed to steer Australia in the right direction, including other political parties.

And come on guys - I've grown up with you. I've talked and raved and ranted and marched and protested with you. I know who you are and what you believe in and what is important to you.

So why are you letting Krudd act like this? Don't you go to countless conferences and party room meetings and dinners and talkfests where these things are planned and discussed? Don't you point out how backwards this kind of mentality is?

Or is the Labor party so entrenched in 20th century thinking that it is as useless as the Liberal Party into leading Australia into the 21st Century?



and I won't even bother to tell you what I think about his pathetic, dickless stance on naked children in photography and art...

R18+ in videogames and why we will never see it.

A lot of people blame Michael Atkinson's stance on videogames, and he is the only AG who went against the popular vote, and claims that he will again.

But something else I discovered about the process of ratings.

Here is the Classifications and Community Standards report from 2007

This is compiled by Galaxy research to determine if people believe ratings are working and are fair.

Here you can see exactly how many people are polled to see if Australia's classifications are up to community Standards.

I'll spell it out to you - 1,516

1,516 people determine the position of the 7 Attorney Generals when it comes to things like what should be rated, how it should be rated, what kind of ratings should be included, and those 7 AGs then go and make laws based on these findings.

1,516.

There are over 21 MILLION people in Australia.

1,516 is not even 1% of the population!

And to top it all off, these bastards have the nerve to go and say it's only "a vocal minority" want an R18+ rating for games.

Last time I counted, 3,708 (the amount polled for the widely quoted statistic that 88% of people want and R18+ rating for games) was greater than 1,516.

In Sydney? Look for me in Time Out!

If anyone reading this is in Sydney, be sure to pick up Time Out magazine as I'm now writing game reviews for them.

My first review will be of Enemy Territory: Quake Wars.

More trouble for Myki?

It appears researchers in London have cracked the Tube's new ticketing system.

At the heart of [the] card is the Mifare chip, made by Philips spin-off NXP.

Designed in the 1990s before processors of that size could handle strong encryption, Mifare has suffered at least three published cracks, according to security experts who have urged TfL to upgrade the system. (link)

Given that Melbourne's Myki is probably a very similar technology, could that mean all the money they've already spent on Myki is a waste?

RIP George Carlin

RIP George Carlin

Very funny man and a great comedian

Here he is at his finest!

Portishead Interview!

For those who don't know, I managed to score an exclusive interview with Portishead.

I chatted to Adrian Utley about a range of things and I'm really happy with the way it turned out.

No, unfortunately I didn't get to speak to Beth, she still doesn't speak to the media.

But you're welcome to read it on inthemix.com.au and I may even put the audio up online soon, which contains Adrian discussing Public Enemy and a whole lot more besides.

Science sucks!

The current trend of media reporting on science experiments as fact about the entire population is really starting to annoy me.

What I want to know is why 14,000 out of 21 Million people is an OK sample size to determine that Australia is a nation of fatties? (source)

Why 13 people out of 6 Billion is an OK sample size to see that brain patterns are different when playing games? (source)

Why 21 people out of 6 billion is an OK sample size to determine that marijuana shrinks brains? (source)

It's ridiculous! The sample sizes are so small that it makes the reports questionable, if not thoroughly erroneous.

It's like looking at the moon and determining all moons are like that. Yes, we used to think that when we could only see our moon, but now we've got the technology we look at more moons and find that a lot of what we used to think about moons is wrong.

When looking at humans, we've got every opportunity to look at millions more than we do now.

So why are we looking at a mere handful and saying "they're representative of the 6 billion of us here", and worse still, bringing in policies and laws to restrict those 6 billion based on not even 1% of that population?

CD reviews coming!

I've been doing a fair bit of CD reviewing for inthemix lately, so thought I may as well start updating my website with them.

I'll start with some of the newer ones, and hopefully will work backwards and get them all up by June.

If you visit FunkyJ.com and click on Music Reviews you can read all the 2008 reviews.

First Melbourne gig Thursday 15 May

I've got my first gig as a Melbourne DJ!

I'm part of Beat Off, with 11 other DJs all dropping 15 minute laid back sets of tunes!

It's being held at the Horse Bazaar, 397 Little Lonsdale St

Other DJs include, BLAXTER, Brain, Dboy, Funky J, Huge, Lephrenic, Myst, RK, SAME'O, Sea, Timmy G and Zero Hour.

It marks the return of Off Beat to a monthly format.

As it's a kind of funky competition , there are rules...

- we must play a 15 minute chill set
- we must include at least one mix, with no maximum
- we bring a team of two or three people for a scavenger hunt
- and we need to invite everybody we know to cheer us all along

DJ times will be drawn from a hat during a glitzy Draw Gala, complete with ring girls!


The flyer is fantastic!


So come for pizza, beer, warm vibes, and the enjoyment as you see how chill music and chaos can so terrifically go together.

DJ Shadow & Cut Chemist

I've been going out to see bands and DJs for 20 years now, and, without sounding like a total fuckhead, I like to think I've pretty much heard and seen everything.

I've been to that many shows, seen so many awesome acts, and quite a few awful ones too, but honestly, I'm sick of the same old shit, week in, week out. I really feel old sometimes when I go out, especially in Melbourne because I don't know anybody, so I really am there just for the music.

And I've got to say, DJ Shadow and Cut Chemist certainly wasn't what I was expecting, and if I was brutally honest I would have preferred to see brainfreeze, but that was pretty fucking good in my opinion.

I like to see and hear original stuff and that was some of the most entertaining and original music and mixing I've ever seen and heard.

The novelty of the music added to the novelty of mixing on 8 decks with all 45s was really special. I loved that they dropped Space Invaders by Player 1 and the Pacman theme. I loved the old 50s swing and rock and roll. I even loved the song they claimed was the worst song ever recorded. I had a smile on my face the entire time.

Yes, it was incredibly indulgent, but I loved the fact that they are masters of their craft and were willing to share their expansive and extensive collection with us.

Shocked and Ashamed

I normally don't write about personal things on this blog, but this has me so perplexed.

The other night I was really drunk, and someone gave me a shot of Chartreuse and I don't remember much after that, but I since discovered I sent my ex some very troubling sms's. I only vaguely remember sending them, but the content of them has me really ashamed at myself.

I abused her for my insecurities.

The thing is, I don't blame her for anything, and I don't feel that I have many insecurities, and I can't understand why I would send that.

It's certainly very out of character for the way I feel about life right at the moment.

I feel on top of the world. I love Melbourne, I'm making some great friends, I still have great friends back home, my job is wonderful and everyone there is glad I'm on the team and telling me I'm doing a really great job. The project is going fine and I can see multiple paths of direction I want to take my life.

My feelings for her have never been better since we broke up. She's getting engaged to a really cool guy, loving her life in the UK, doing well in her job, and I'm really happy she's happy.

I've never felt better about myself and my life. I've finally taken control of my life and my actions and feel the consequences of those actions are my own.

So why the hell did I abuse her in such a way, and so suddenly out of the blue?

I feel so ashamed. I really can't understand it.

I'm thinking maybe I wrote it as a joke or something, but that still doesn't make sense - how could she know it was a joke? Yes, the message was cut off - like I sent it accidentally, but that still doesn't excuse it.

It was stupid and idiotic, and I am at a loss to explain it.

It was so... schizophrenic of me.

I sent a message apologising, but I don't expect her to forgive me.

On the plus side, it's made me seriously consider giving up drinking for a while.

Health

Apparently hospitals are "over flowing" with people with preventable disease.

Alcohol, tobacco, drug and obesity cost Australia $56 billion and will cost some millions of lives by 2009.

"Health problems are not just about fixing hospitals, we actually have to fix some of the things that mean people end up in hospital."

"With prevention, clogged Hospitals will be freed up" were some of the quotes from the Health Minister.

RUBBISH!

Who the fuck is this government to tell me how to live?

And what exactly are hospitals for, if not to care for the sick - NO MATTER HOW THEY GOT SICK?

This is simply the Government trying to unload it's burden onto us, the hard working men and women of Australia who deserve a drink, a smoke or a joint.

All they want us to be is happy little worker bees, producing wealth for them and their corporation owning buddies.

"oh, don't be a drain on society, you've got to look after yourself".

Maybe if those pricks worked harder at making this society a better place for us ALL to live, maybe if they instead of opening up markets for banks to rape us, they made banks accountable to communities; instead of pouring billions into shoring up wasteful and unproductive industries like the Motor industry, they concentrated on infrastructure and maintaining control of public assets, we wouldn't feel the need to go home and drink, smoke or get high!

I'm sick of this bullshit nanny state mentality by all governments, left and right wing. I'm sick of these people thinking I need to be controlled, otherwise I'll go off the rails and do something "horrible".

We live in a society that has unprecedented life expectancy. People who are born with disabilities that would have killed them 100 years ago are living to 80 or 90 years old.

Why should it matter if someone wants to drink/smoke/drug themselves to death?

It's just nature's way to even out the population.

No one ever said we should prevent blind children from being able to live their lives the way they want, so why should I be any different because I've chosen to drink?

Supanova 08 pictures now on Ringo

Title says it all...

Supanova 08 pictures now up on Ringo.

Supanova 08

Well, Supanova hit Melbourne for the first time, and had a pretty interesting time.

I went briefly on Saturday to scope it out and look around, and was appalled to find out autographs from the stars started at $30! Fuck that.

But I did go to the Cosplay, and took a heap of pictures which you can find on facebook.

The detail of the costumes and the funny little skits these kids worked on for the costumes was awesome. Some went on for a little too long, and I'm not sure who won, but it's really great to see this kind of thing happening here as it does in the US and Japan.

* * * * *

On Sunday I was a volunteer at the Queensland Games/Krome Studios stall. We demoed Viva Pinata and had Ty The Tasmanian Tiger posters, as well as Ty himself!

Some things I noticed about working this stall:
- We should have had Ty on display as well as Viva Pinata. Ty is a very popular game - I had people asking when the next one was coming out, or if we are making it for PSP / PS3 / Xbox360, constantly.
- Actually, we should have been showing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed. Whenever the QG video showed the trailer for that, people stopped to watch it. We would have been bigger than the SingStar stall if we had.
- Kids recognise and associate with the Viva Pinata cartoon, whereas older teens and adults know the game, and it really causes confusion. Our game, Viva Pinata Party Animals is based on the cartoon series and aimed at kids, and is not a true sequel to the original Rare game.
- There's some really sad and lonely people out there and games and game characters really touch them (and I'm not just talking about Steve in the Ty suit...)
- There are a lot of yummy mummies at conventions (or maybe I'm just being less picky in my old age)


I also attended the talks by John Rhys Davies and Lou Ferrigno.

Lou's talk was good, although he has trouble hearing and with the accent so had to get someone to repeat every question and the intention of some questions sometimes went awry. It's interesting to hear that he is 57 and still works out, and has trained with Chuck Norris, and how no one hassles him out in bars. He's a sheriff now with the California police, which is sure to freak out some drugged out crim he busts I bet!

John's talk was very moral and philosophical. He began by telling us he's pissed off that the UK government is thinking of denying ancestry rights to Australians. As he said, there's only 20,000 aussies in the last 5 years who've emigrated and not many of them have used Ancestry to stay there. He then went on a big diatribe on how he thinks pornography is wrong, how his generation championed rights but not responsibilities, and how he thinks we abandon children at 16, amongst other things. It was very interesting and although I don't agree with every point he made, it was very enlightening hearing that sort of talk from a celebrity.

I really wanted to stay for Jewel Staite and David Harris's talks, but I was pretty over it by 3... geeks/nerds are nice and all, but they're a little bit full on when in large numbers, even for me and I'm a pretty major nerd.

Why? Why!? WHY!?!?!

Apple and Microsoft spent millions of dollars on developing FREE video editing software and it's pretty simple to use, so why is it that NOBODY edits videos on youtube?

Everybody just sits there and talks into a camera, "Big Brother" style. Is the world really full of so many morons?

Staring into a camera and talking for 5 minutes is NOT INTERESTING, no matter HOW WITTY YOU THINK YOU ARE.

I was browsing a few things, and being an atheist myself I saw one titled "the Amazing Atheist", and decided to watch.

After a minute or so of him yabbering on and procrastinating, I shut it off. If he's amazing, then I'm afraid us atheists are in a lot of trouble because he was pretty uninspiring.

Check this guy out here... And compare it to a preacher such as Tye Tribbett

Yeah, sure, Tribett is full of shit, but if I was some impressionable young kid looking for meaning in the world, I'd know who I'd prefer to listen to...

A week in Adelaide

I just spent 10 days in Adelaide.

Every single day was over 38 degrees... and I didn't get burnt once! YAY!

I went over for Womad, which was very hot, very dusty, but a lot of fun. Highlights included Mojo Web, Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings, Billy Cobham, John Buttler Trio, Soul Jazz Sound System and Nickodemus.

I caught up with most of the people I wanted to catch up with, and spent most of the time either watching TV and drinking, or at the beach and drinking, or in the park and drinking.

There's no pictures because I forgot to take my bloody camera :(

RIP Gary Gygax

RIP Mr Gygax.

Without you I wouldn't have made the friends I have made or be the person I am today.

And I'd probably be worse at math too!



Gary Gygax - creator of Dungeons & Dragons dies

The rattling of dice across tabletops around the word falls silent today with the news that co-creator of Dungeons & Dragons and TSR, Gary Gygax, has passed away at the age of 69. The news came via the forums of Troll Lord Games, who publish Gygax's Lejendary Adventures and Castles & Crusades sourcebooks, delivered via his son Ernie Gygax. He died in his home, having been in failing health for some time, suffering several strokes and a near heart-attack. Gygax was an inspiration to the gaming industry, with his work directly or indirectly influencing entire genres - role-playing games and MMORPGs specifically. Gary Gygax may have passed on, but the legacy he leaves to gaming will live on forever. Rest in peace, Dungeon Master.

(from Kotaku)

Back online!

Thanks to hostonce's terrible customer service, my domain expired.

I was notified on Friday last week, and cut off on Saturday. I sent 2 emails and posted 3 help desk questions and got a response on Tuesday.

That's not good enough.

And now because I wanted my site and email back on ASAP I'm locked into another 6 months with them...

At least everything is functioning now.